Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling in a Spiritual Context
 My work with couples is guided by a model of “relationship as spiritual practice” and of “relational mutuality.”
In healthy mutual relationships each person can share his or her feelings, thoughts and ideas and feel that they have an impact on the other as well as on the relationship. Each person can allow
themselves to remain open to being moved, to respond with compassionate understanding. Each person learns to make choices that will consider and take care of the relationship -- this represents the
basis for creating mutually empowering and growth-enhancing relationships.As part of my therapy with couples I bring the idea that being-in-relationship is a spiritual practice--two voices in
dialogue creating something new, two voices creating a we” and empowering both. Within the support of a contemplative environment in the psychotherapy we can come to see how all psychological problems are
spiritual issues - ways in which we have lost a connection to our true selves. I try to help couples see that each difficulty provides a special kind of spiritual opportunity. In my counseling work with
couples I support each person’s capacity to hold an awareness of themselves, their partner and their marriage or relationship. As I sit with a couple, my first priority is to notice the quality of their
connection - which is always in the present moment. We can explore together the conditioned patterns and unconscious identities that arise from each person’s personal history - to deepen compassionate
understanding and possibly prevent these patterns from causing further suffering. His Holiness the Dalai Lama has said, “There is no denying that our happiness is inextricably bound up with the
happiness of others. We cannot escape the necessity of love and compassion...Kindness then is my true religion...There is no need for complicated philosophy, doctrine or dogma. Our own heart, our own
mind, is the temple.” For further information on couples therapy and marriage counseling or
to schedule an appointment,
please call (510) 848-3372 or send email.
Offices in Berkeley, San Francisco,
and Marin County, California.
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